get to know yourself (for fun)

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This will always be funny 😂

The scamner got scammed funny video #williamsuchemba #peterarmandboyo #actor #nollywood #funnyvideos 

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On unwarranted praise

“Flattery is a kind of bad money, to which our vanity gives currency.” 
  – François de La Rochefoucauld

You may have experienced the social farce about which Chuba Ezekwesili wrote:

...Flatterers offer ebullient greetings with the expectation of immediate financial remuneration for their ‘arduous’ task of unabashed adulation. With money, criminals can instantaneously become ‘honorables’. They can also become ‘elders’ in the church and most possibly ‘saints’, if it was permitted. Money in Nigeria also has this wonderful effect of reversing age differences. Suddenly, you can become ‘daddy’ or ‘uncle’ to someone who’s competing with your grandfather’s grey hairs.

And because half my readership comes from outside Nigeria, I’ll drop a few commonly used Nigerian greetings you should be wary…just in case you venture back into Nigeria. These include “We remain loyal”, “My Oga”,”My Chairman”, “Well done Sah”, “Anything for your boys?”, “You too much O!” ,”Happy Weekend” etc.

Flattery’s a unique product because it’s not only exchanged for money, it also takes the place of money in many cases. Like currency, flattery can be ‘exchanged’ for other goods/products such as job opportunities, political appointments and sexual favors. Religious leaders use flattery to placate their congregation and keep them hoping. Politicians use flattery-as well as other expensive and forcefully persuasive resources- to garner the votes of the masses. Nigerian men prolifically use flattery to win the favor of women and vice-versa. And the most amusing of all are the Nigerian policemen who flatter/hustle money from you.

...Nigeria. A country where the bitter truth is anathema and flattery is the cherished medicine. Don’t ‘embarrass’ the President, Minister, Governor, Pastor or authority by being honest. Instead, allow their ineptitude to continue.   Little do those who constantly have an excuse for the ineptitude of authority realize that they are only worsening the performance of those they adulate.

Overall, flattery is not necessarily detrimental and can be invaluable…especially when you’re in a relationship. It just depends on how much of it you decide to take in. Those who fail to control their demand for flattery might end up getting so much of it that they begin to trade in their own coins…and I believe that’s called self-flattery. And to those who love to trade in flattery, remember – your flattery is like cash, the more you dish it out, the less value it holds over time.


More...

Mobile Number Portability coming soon

Number portability was coming soon three years ago, but now maybe it's really very near. 
Been waiting so long, we don't really give a blank. 
What I object to is the little symbol they at the NCC have designed to illustrate the program: it has arrows cycling merrily between the four major mobile companies: MTN, Airtel, Etisalat, Glo. 

Source: Frequently Asked Questions on MNP, NCC

From what folks are saying, the net change will be more like this:

Anyway, information:
Mobile Number Portability (MNP) is a service that enables you to keep your mobile phone number when changing from one mobile service provider to another.  So, if you switch between service providers, you do not have to go through the trouble of informing all your friends, family, colleagues, and other contacts because your number stays the same. 
Mobile number portability will initially be available among the four GSM mobile operators. - (NCC)

Dude who outsourced his programming job to China

Bob was his company’s best software developer, got glowing performance reviews and earned more than $250,000 a year.
Then [his employer found that] Bob was paying a Chinese firm about $50,000 a year to do his work, then spent the day surfing the web, watching cat videos and updating his Facebook page.

Source: How a 'model' employee got away with outsourcing his software job to China

More from the same article:
“His code was clean, well-written, and submitted in a timely fashion.  Quarter after quarter, his performance review noted him as the best developer in the building.”
but
"Looking at his web browsing history, investigators found that Bob spent his workday checking sites such as Reddit, Ebay, Facebook and LinkedIn and watching cat videos. Then he would type an e-mail at the end of the day to update management about his “work” and left at 5 p.m."

Funny or not-so-much? 

Pie Gates and Flog Lance

Remember Pie Gates?
It's this little video-game from the nineties where you click to smack Bill Gates in the face with a pie - splat!  Proven stress reliever... 

Screenshot of the classic Pie Bill Gates game from kuenstner.de

Then he started to give his money away through the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.  Nowadays, everybody loves Bill.
It is important to be nice, not just rich, I think.  

Meanwhile, some dude named Lance Armstrong has built a stellar career as a doping cyclist.  Now that he's been exposed, he has to give up all his Tour de France titles.
I propose a video-game to vent our anger at cheating assholes like him.  Call it Flog Lance. 

Meanwhile, here is a modern version of pie gates, lol, in case you've moved on from Windows 95.

Cashless Lagos

Now that the cash-transaction limits are operating in Lagos, folks are adapting.  According to the Central Bank, the "cashless" policy was originated for the good of customers and of the banking system, and is being tested out in Lagos first.
However, BusinessDay reports that "customers [have] embarked on counter-measures through opening of multiple accounts...banks and their customers are in a battle of wits to outsmart each other on the impact of the penalty." 

I just had to steal this cartoon:

References: cbn.gov.ng/cashless , BusinessDay and cashlesslagos.org